Beachcombing

Do you know what rattles my cage? Glad that you asked. Here are a few examples:

• Forcing elementary schools to add alternative lifestyles, like transgender, to their curriculum. Ditto that for all sports. No one should be confused about which rest room to use.
• Allowing illegal aliens to have access to services that the rest of us must pay for. Arrest and deport them, banning any future opportunity to legally apply for citizenship or dine at Taco Bell.
• Congress’ failure to ban private ownership of assault weapons. Require billions of dollars in restitution by assault gun manufacturers and distributors for injuries sustained or for the loss of loved ones.
• Tolerating politicians who vote on items benefitting their campaign contributors. Put them in jail, contributor and politician alike, in the same cell, since they love each other so much.
• Permanently close retail stores that ignore shoplifters, especially the Target on Bellflower, Vons at the Traffic Circle and other local grocery stores. I am told that some Middle East countries chop off shoplifter’s hands/fingers. Maybe they could do something similar for adulterers.

A few years ago, we printed the following obituary that reportedly appeared in the London Times. It is just as valid now.

“Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

• Knowing when to come in out of the rain
• Why the early bird gets the worm
• Life isn’t always fair
• Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.

Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his four stepbrothers:

• I Know My Rights
• I Want It Now
• Someone Else Is to Blame
• I’m a Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.”

publisher@beachcomber.news