Beachcombing

We’ve been asked by some very talented professionals who want to write a column for the Beachcomber and most of the time have said “yes.” In fact, about half of our content is provided by volunteers very knowledgeable in their field, who love to write and want to share their knowledge with others. The rest is a combination of feature stories written by our college journalism interns and news items written by paid reporters.

Stephen Downing is knowledgeable about policing; Ben Miles enjoys reviewing theater productions; John Thomas goes to the movies and annually to the Venice Film Festival; Michael Shafer is an investment advisor at Edward Jones; Claudine Burnett is a retired librarian who writes about Long Beach history and Mary Brennan is a retired teacher who loves to read and write about books.

Lately Jonathan Pekar has joined our team of writers, using the title of “food dude” to share his experiences at local restaurants. He recently moved to Long Beach but works in the entertainment industry as an actor, stand-up comic, and doing video and musical productions.

If you are a recognized expert in your field and would enjoy writing 500-600 words every other week for publication, let’s talk. Being a columnist is a good way to drum up new business if you are not retired. Topics relating to health care, law, politics and home improvement would be a good fit for the Beachcomber.

We will edit your column for spelling, grammar and style and even make room for your mug shot and byline. To distinguish between stories written by our reporters, your column may include a tagline in italics at the end saying something like “For additional information call (phone number) or e-mail (address).”

We ignore hundreds of emailed story pitches on a wide variety of topics every week. If the content is local to Long Beach, that is what gets our attention.

Time for a little bit of humor:

• The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but the ability to keep your mouth shut in any language is priceless.
• Be decisive. Right or wrong, make a decision. The road is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision.
• Happiness is not having to set the alarm clock.
• When I get a headache, I take two aspirin and keep away from children, just like the bottle says.
• Just once, I want the prompt for username and password to say, “Close enough.”
• Becoming an adult is the dumbest thing I’ve ever done.
•  “Your call is very important to us. Please enjoy this 40-minute flute solo.”
• I hate it when I can’t figure out how to operate the iPad and my tech support guy is asleep. He’s 5 and it’s past his bedtime.
• Today’s 3-year-olds can switch on laptops and open their favorite apps. When I was 3, I ate mud.
• Tip for a successful marriage: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she’s mowing the lawn.
• So, you drive across town to a gym to walk on a treadmill?
• Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven’t met yet.
• Why do I have to press one for English when you’re just going to transfer me to someone I can’t understand anyway?

publisher@beachcomber.news