By Jay Beeler

One of my favorite lines from comedian Ron White is “You can’t fix stupid” as he puffs on his cigar, drinks what appears to be scotch and rattles off many off-color jokes.

He came to mind the other day when an ad representative for a fitness gym inquired about advertising in our upcoming Best of Long Beach section. His assumption was that his client – which was new in our city – would be a winner in that category.

Wrong. With more than 40 local fitness clubs in the Long Beach area, it would take many dozens of votes to come out on top.


Let me educate you on the top ways to be a winner:

Be the best in your profession. When you achieve excellence your customers will tell others. This is called “word of mouth.”

Promote your business through traditional marketing communications methods, such as advertising, direct mail, publicity, signage, internet, etc. There are several local newspapers and magazines that can be utilized for this purpose, but ads in the Beachcomber mean that contest participants will be aware of your products or services.

Become a contest sponsor. We offer the opportunity for your business to sponsor our Best of Long Beach, Long Beach Treasures and other contests annually. The cost is just a dozen gift certificates or gift cards valued at $25 each. Your business name will appear at the top of each printed ballot as a contest sponsor. This is called “top of mind.”

Join a local business networking organization, such as the Executives Association of Long Beach. This way you will have 50-plus members helping you to promote your business in our contests as well as through social media. Wanna join EALB? Give me a call.

Download our online ballot or share its link with your existing customers, family and friends, asking for their vote.


Readers who submit ballots can also help you become a winner.  Even though we stress that participants should vote for local businesses only, some will waste their vote on ineligible national businesses.

Another crazy voter activity is the failure to provide a personal name versus a business name. When we ask readers to vote for the best real estate agent, that does not mean the name of their real estate company. Voting for XYZ Dental versus John Smith, DDS, is another example of a wasted vote.

We’ve been running this contest for 24 years now, tabulating many thousands of votes. We have a fairly good idea of what works and what does not.

Oscar Wilde said that “Imitation is the best form of flattery” and we are pleased to see the other local newspapers copying our contest every year.

Finally on this topic, we’ll be announcing the winners of the current contest in our May 3 edition versus April 19, as previously announced.


Charlie Chaplin lived 88 years. He reportedly made these four statements:

(1) Nothing is forever in this world, not even our problems.

(2) I love walking in the rain because no one can see my tears.

(3) The most lost day in life is the day we don’t laugh.

(4) Six best doctors in the world: the sun, rest, exercise, diet, self-respect and friends. Stick to them at all stages of your life and enjoy a healthy life.


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