Beachcombing

This year we hosted a Christmas party for the Beachcomber staff at our home. It was the first such party in eight years and a good time was had by all those folks you see in the masthead – the box in the lower right corner of this page – and my wife’s rum cake was superb.

Coincidentally our fortunes were not so great between 2008 and 2016. The stagnant economy seemed to be in conjunction with the Obama administration. Imagine that.

Suddenly the economy is picking up steam, the stock market is growing like crazy and jobs are plentiful. This good news seems to coincide with the Trump administration. Imagine that.

I am in total agreement with the letter writer in our last issue, Vance Frederick, who advised readers to “get over it.” Hillary lost, Donald won. Stop the witch hunts, send Nancy Pelosi packing and jump on the gravy train.

Admittedly The Don is a bit wacko, but I am solidly behind him and others who pledge to do something positive, then do it. I liken him to being crazy like a fox.

After 39 years of self employment I’ve witnessed the ups and downs of the economy and readily recognize that good times are here again. In fact, we’re already planning the 2018 Beachcomber Christmas party for Dec. 16. Put it on your calendar now!

Along those same lines we see city management progressing on a land use plan that will take us into the future. I applaud the work of city management for looking downstream a few decades and coming up with a rational strategy for accommodating housing needs.

Hopefully these same managers will recognize that keeping Community Hospital open is a wise move, ignore the scientific BS about earthquakes and proceed to remain open with or without MemorialCare. Options exist and we need a few community leaders to step up to the plate.

Our online poll continues to show that 75 percent of our readers agree that the hospital and its emergency department are needed and must remain open.

A huge “thank you” is extended to our readers who sent cards and monetary contributions to our carriers for their hard work in 2017. There’s still time to do so by mailing to: Beachcomber Carrier, PO Box 15679, Long Beach, CA 90815. We cross reference your address with our route map to determine who should receive your holiday greetings.

More paraprosdokians, which are figures of speech wherein the latter part is surprising or unexpected:

•  I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted pay checks.
• A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.
• I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with “Guess” on it ... So I said, “Implants?”
• Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
• Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut and still think they are sexy.
• Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
• Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
• A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
• You do not need a parachute to sky dive. You only need a parachute to sky dive more than once.
• I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure.
• When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the fire department usually uses water.
• Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

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